character

January 2007-September 2008 was a very difficult time in my life.  Probably the hardest yet.  I won't bother going into the particulars.  As hard as that time was for me, I am very thankful for it as well.  I learned so much in that period and I wouldn't trade the scars or experience for anything.  I firmly believe I was meant to go through what I did in order to get where I am today.  In this beautiful place in my life.  

My pastor said something the other day that struck me with such clarity.  He said, "The Lord saves us FROM something, to save us FOR something."  I know that is what happened in my life.  What a blessing and how precious a gift the Lord gives and takes away for our own good.  He truly knows best.

Music (as usual) was exceptionally healing for me during this time.  There were probably about 6 songs I had on constant repeat the entire time.  Reminders of where I'd been and where I was headed (even though I didn't know at the time).  I listened to one of those songs this morning on the way to work, and I was reminded of that time of my life and how hard it was...  and how the Lord carried me through.  I felt like I wrote this song...every line spoke directly to my situation.  The haunting I felt.  The breakdowns I had DAILY.  When it was all said and done and I was able to move on, it still took a little while to realize the character that was built through all of it.  I definitely felt like I went through the fire and the Lord carried me out clean and renewed.

Some of my dearest friends are currently going through very difficult times and I wish I could convey the hope I know is there.  This time WILL pass.  In the midst of experiencing the difficulties it is very hard to feel that and believe that.  Please hold on.  God is saving you FOR something amazing because He saved you FROM a bad situation!!

The words of this song are so profound and healing.  Let them soak into your soul.

Less Like Scars by Sara Groves

It's been a hard year
But I'm climbing out of the rubble
These lessons are hard
Healing changes are subtle
But every day it's

Less like tearing, more like building
Less like captive, more like willing
Less like breakdown, more like surrender
Less like haunting, more like remember

And I feel you here
And you're picking up the pieces
Forever faithful
It seemed out of my hands, a bad situation
But you are able
And in your hands the pain and hurt
Look less like scars and more like
Character

Less like a prison, more like my room
It's less like a casket, more like a womb
Less like dying, more like transcending
Less like fear, less like an ending

And I feel you here
And you're picking up the pieces
Forever faithful
It seemed out of my hands, a bad situation
But you are able
And in your hands the pain and hurt
Look less like scars

Just a little while ago
I couldn't feel the power or the hope
I couldn't cope, I couldn't feel a thing
Just a little while back
I was desperate, broken, laid out, hoping
You would come

And I need you
And I want you here
And I feel you

And I know you're here

And you're picking up the pieces
Forever faithful
It seemed out of my hands, a bad, bad situation
But you are able

And in your hands the pain and hurt
Look less like scars

And more like
Character